Monday, March 19, 2012

Feeldoe Review

When it comes to pegging, obviously the toy that you use is going to be important. It’s easy to get a strap-on that doesn’t really work well. Some of them are too flimsy, others too hard. Some of them have bulky harnesses that can make their use inconvenient and ruin the intimacy of the encounter. Another problem is that many strap-ons aren’t really built to pleasure the giving partner, making pegging a more one-sided affair.

One toy that aims to overcome all these issues is the Feeldoe. It’s labeled as the first harness-free strap-on. The way it works is that it has the standard dildo part like you’d see on any strap-on, but instead of a harness it has a bulbous “handle” to it, sticking out vertically at a slight angle. This bulbous end can be inserted into the woman’s vagina and then held there with her PC muscles. The dildo end then sticks out as it would on a normal strap-on.

This can take some practice to master for women who don’t have very developed muscles in that area, but the idea is sound and it can work. When used properly, it creates a more “organic” strap-on experience without having a big harness in the way. Plus, the bulbous part inserted in the vagina rocks around as the woman thrusts, giving her some vaginal stimulation. And even beyond that, ridges in the base of the shaft part rub up against her clitoris, making it fully possible for a woman to have an orgasm while using the toy.
The Feeldoe’s only real downside (aside from the high pricetag) is that it can be tricky to get used to it. Women who aren’t experienced with it may find that it falls out or shifts out of position a lot. But with a little practice, it’s easy to master and then it becomes the perfect pegging toy!

The Feeldoe comes in four sizes – the smallest being the Slim, then the base model (Violet), then the larger models – the More and the Stout. Each step up in size increases the length and girth of the shaft part, while keeping the size of the bulbous part the same. There’s also the “Realdoe” which gives the toy a more realistic fleshly look.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Pegging Positions

So we’ve talked about the what and the why of pegging in this blog, but not really the “how.” If you’re new to pegging, then there are a few things that you should probably know!

First off, the anal basics. If you aren’t familiar with having anal sex, then there are a few things you should be aware of. First of all, cleanliness usually isn’t an issue for anal, but if you’re irregular or have a bowel movement imminent, you want to avoid anything going up your rear more than a little bit. It’s perhaps a bit counterintuitive, but the best time for anal is actually right after emptying your bowels. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to bathe right before, too!

Rule #2: Lube! Lube is super important for any anal sex, especially for “beginners.” If this is his first time being pegged, you’ll want to use a lot of lube! This will help ensure the experience is comfortable and mostly painless – and thus more pleasurable. Even if part of the fantasy is a little bit of pain, lube is still important to prevent injury!

Now, as for positions. There are two standard positions for pegging. One is doggy style, with the male on his knees bending forward. This one can be tricky for couples who are mismatched in height, but with a little creative placement of pillows it should be workable. The other good position is missionary, and this one is really preferable to a lot of people. In this position, the man lays on his back and lifts up his rear end and legs to allow penetration. In this position, it’s much easier for the woman to also stimulate the male’s penis and balls with her hands or even her mouth. Alternately, this position also makes it easier for the male to masturbate himself.

There are certainly other positions to explore, but those are the two main ones. Have fun!

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Talking About Pegging

On the grand scale of kinks, pegging is reasonably high up on the list. It takes anal sex, which is already pretty taboo for some folks, and adds a whole new dimension to it. So if you’re the kind of person – male or female – who is interested in pegging, you may have a hard time finding a willing partner to indulge you. If you want to bring up the idea of pegging to your partner, or you have and were shot down, here are some ideas to help you convince them.

For Women:

The Trade: Tell your guy that you’ll let him have your ass if you can take this. Obviously this doesn’t really work if he’s not into anal or if it’s something you do a lot anyway.

Start Small: During your normal sexual adventures, start gently exploring around his anus. Don’t go inside yet – just rub around the outside. In most cases, he’ll enjoy it, and if he does you can keep pushing boundaries until you’re getting a whole finger or two up there. At that point, you might as well be pegging him!

Play the Domme: A lot of men have a fantasy about dominant women. Play the role (a kinky outfit and some sexy heels or boots will help) and see how he responds. Tie him to the bed and tease him with the idea of pegging, see if he responds better to it when in this context.

For Men:

Reassurance: Reassure her that this isn’t a “gay” thing and that you wanting her to peg you doesn’t mean that you don’t still enjoy your normal sexual routine. It’s just a little spice.

Explore Anal: Ask her if she minds if you use a butt plug or prostate massage toy while you have sex with her. When she sees just how much you love the anal stimulation, she might come around and want to be the one who delivers that pleasure.

Let Her Take Control: Tell her that pegging allows her to be the one in total control. Some women aren’t really into that idea, but some of them will jump at it in a second!

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Is Pegging Gay?

A common reaction when the topic of pegging comes up is to write it off as a “gay activity.” That is, any man who is interested in being pegged must secretly be a homosexual or bisexual. And as progressive as some men are these days, being accused of that is enough to put them off of pegging for good. So what is the connection between pegging and homosexuality?

In almost all cases, the answer is nothing. There is no connection. Most men who want to be pegged aren’t even slightly interested in sex with another man. Pegging is a sex act that takes place between a man and a woman. It is by definition a heterosexual act. The only real exception to this rule is if the male partner is fantasizing about being fucked by a real man and can’t get off without that fantasy. In that case, he probably has some self-exploring to do.

But that is by far the minority of cases. Most guys who love to be pegged would cringe at the idea of a real dick inside them. So if you’re worried that your husband who wants to be pegged might be in the closet, don’t worry! And if you’re a guy wondering if your pegging fantasy translates into a gay sex fantasy, don’t sweat it! You’re fine! Now go out and enjoy pegging with your opposite sex partner!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Why Pegging?

Some people look at the act of pegging and can’t see past the purely physical element of it. To them, it looks like it wouldn’t really be pleasurable to either party. The woman isn’t really being stimulated at all, and for a lot of straight men anal sex sounds more painful than anything else. So what is there to really gain from pegging?

Even just from a purely physical standpoint, there’s plenty to love about pegging. Since the practice has become more popular over the past several years, more strapons are being developed specifically with pegging in mind. As such, they are built to provide some stimulation for the woman, as well. This can be things like a clit vibrator or even a double-sided dildo that penetrates the woman as she penetrates the man.

From the male perspective, pegging can be pleasurable. The anus is erogenous zone, whether men like to admit this or not. Ironically, a lot of men are intrigued by being the giving partner in an anal sex situation, but the idea of receiving totally turns them off. If anal sex is really all that bad, guys, why do you want to put your partner through it!? Fortunately, anal isn’t as uncomfortable or painful or gross as popular opinion seems to think it is.

In fact, men have a sort of “g-spot” that is located near their rectal cavity. This is called the prostate, and anal penetration is the best way to stimulate it, and that’s what pegging is all about!

Beyond the pure physical aspects of pegging, there’s a lot to be gained on a mental and emotional level. Men are used to being the ones who are in control and the giving partners, while women are passive and receiving. Pegging allows for some role reversal – the woman gets to control the flow of the action and the man becomes the passive receiver. It can be mentally stimulating and exciting for both partners to experience this role switch!

Next time: the big question – is pegging gay?

Friday, March 2, 2012

What is Pegging?

Let’s get introductions out of the way real quick. My name is Zoe, and I’m a 32-year old woman who works in the health field. I’m happily married and have one child. Um, I guess that’s really it, so I’ll go right to the fun.

This is a blog primarily about pegging. What is pegging, you ask? I wouldn’t blame you if you hadn’t heard the term before, as it’s a bit of a fringe sexual practice. Pegging refers to the act of a woman wearing a strap-on and penetrating a male partner in the anus. Or, to put it less politely, it’s a woman butt-fucking a guy with a strap-on.

“Pegging” actually got its name thanks to the sex advice columnist Dan Savage. He kept on getting questions about the practice but there was no formal name for it, so he petitioned his readers to try and come up with one. The word they came up with was “pegging” and it stuck. It’s now pretty much the official name for the act, and I think it fits nicely.

Pegging, I’m sure, isn’t for everyone. It’s not inherently pleasurable for a woman, and many men find the idea of anything going up their butts to be terrifying. But pegging can be a very fun and unique sexual experience if you are open to the idea. I’ll go into some more reasons why pegging is great in my next post, but for now, if the idea seems crazy to you, I urge you to open up your mind and think about it a little more...

Until next time!